Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Sometimes i don't understand why i'm so eager to want to be with someone. I'm thinking twice (or maybe LOADS of times) about confessing my feelings cuz i'm not sure what to expect from him. I know i might sound selfish but when it's time for me to leave this place, i want to leave with content. I want to be able to look down from the airplane and think "i'm finally fucking leaving this shithole." and i know if i was with someone, it'll be that "it's hard to wave goodbye from aeroplanes when i just don't think that you could see" in my head. BUT i also don't wanna leave with "what would really happen if i told him how i felt". I hate 'what if's. And i think every second i'd spend with him before i leave IF i was ever going to tell him how i really feel about him and we'd get together would be worth the pain of not having him around with me all the time i'll be away. I like him. A lot. And i think i'm getting positive feedbacks. Or at least i hope i am.
I know you panicked when i told you i quit. Don't try to hide it (to think about it...you never did try to hide it). Jeez man, tell me already. What the fuck are you waiting for anyway? I fucking want to hear it from you, too.
Spent yesteday with Ina & Muly, i just got home like half an hour ago from the time of this post. To sum yesterday up, i looked like shit and my t-shirt was our amusement and the both of the girls are great to talk to. I love them. ♥
Inner peace my ass. It's a jumble right now. This is stupid. What is so hard with saying what you're feeling? Don't answer that. <3
Envy drowned in words at 17:44
[- 0 wrecked words -]
